Would you like to win a copy of my second book Bent Object of My Affection ?
Leave a haiku in the comment section about the above image.
Make it a real haiku though (5 syllables, 7, then 5 again).
I'll be giving a copy away each day until Valentine's Day in contests
having to do with different Bent Objects images.
having to do with different Bent Objects images.
But maybe you want to buy your own copy?
(I've heard it makes a pretty good gift)
Contest is closed! Thanks for all who entered!
Contest is closed! Thanks for all who entered!
I gave the win to Caty, an artist for making me chuckle the most.
42 comments:
Left alone all day
And then the impulse hits him...
Man. He's such a jerk.
"Lonely is the night
When you find yourself alone"...
Not what Billy meant.
Lotion and tissues.
They come in very handy
In the dark of night.
How do you know when
To trust the card players' hands?
Do they hold all hearts?
He is asleep now.
Ew. He did not wash his hands.
I know, right? Let's play.
Didn't hear ah-choo
Dry hands are not his issue
He needs a tissue
Lotion is used, not woman
Rise and fall, an explosion.
Tissue mops the slop.
Creative juices
We will "wipe out" galaxies
Waiting for "Spring" rain
Opps! That is not right! Here is amended version:
The lotion is used.
Rise and Fall. An Explosion!
Tissue mops the slop.
Predictably, they
polished up their producing
of the royal flush.
A few hands of cards
Until he has need for us
I hope not tonight
You got any fives?
Again? You must be cheating!
You need a tissue?
lotion and tissue
are awaiting the master
not with bated breath
This is so boring.
Cest la vie. Another round?
Nah, let's fuck instead.
is better to enjoy loneliness,
than to wish you were here,knowing...
we´re useless with out you.
I'm made for dry skin.
I'm made for runny noses.
Depressing ... go fish.
I don't mind my job.
That's because yours is real fun.
I'm just clean up crew.
Five minutes of play
Then to sit and wait again
*sigh* got any fives?
My hand is empty.
(That's what he said!)"No. Go fish."
"Heh, got any 'jacks?'"
Wanna play slapjack?
Playing that later tonight.
Old maid it is then.
When will he use us?
The waiting is the worst part
You have any threes?
solitaire is done.
no playing texas hold 'em.
now the waiting game.
"There you go again...
Complaining you feel so used."
"Shut up and discard!"
Oh, what, a haiku?
‘bout poker playing tissue?
Say I don’t need to.
It could be worse, and
We all have our time to shine
However short lived.
No partner for cards
No partner to share the bed
Tissues for my ... tears?
hearts adorn my hands
inspire dreams of royal blush
everlasting love
Performance last night
I wiped him out completely
Think you missed a spot
Everything's ready
For Rosie and her sisters.
Date night at my house.
lotion knows the game
his hot streak is long over
folds like wet tissue
The nightly poker
showdown: store label versus
Mr. Fancy Brand.
Email has been sent
(Mike dot Rowe at Dirty Jobs)
Now they sit and wait.
Tissue holds a flush
Lotion plays hand close to chest
Tissue wipes up pot
No lace, no doilies,
No pink, no pets in cute frames
Until he marries.
Now our work is done
Glad that we could help you, dude
Time to have OUR fun
"Tsk! Look at the hour!"
"Lately it's been 'Her, her, HER!' "
"I could cry." "Tissue?"
Tissue having fun
Loction a bit more uptight
Playing for the win
Quick! Must finish game!
His date will come over soon.
We'll be put away.
Lotion gets all wet
"It looks like a winning hand",
"I'll fold", says tissue
If you think about
our job, it's embarrasing.
But we're old hands here.
We're not ones to judge,
Yet embarrassed all the same.
Still no hairy palms?
A cheap date tonight,
my poor gal had a headache,
the lotion was on sale.
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